Our favorite chili

My husband and I made this our first year dating (8 years ago!). I'm not saying that this chili will make you fall in love and get married, but it worked for us. Among other things. But this chili really is special. It's got beer and chocolate in it. Two very romantic things indeed.

Our favorite chili 

Ingredients:

• 2T olive or vegetable oil 
• 2 onions (chopped) 
• 1 red pepper (chopped)
• 6 cloves garlic (minced) 
• 1lb of ground beef (I've also used ground turkey before) 
• 3/4lb beef sirloin (cubed) (if you're using ground turkey instead of ground beef, substitute the sirloin with 1lb of sweet chicken sausage) 
• 1 (14.5oz) can peeled and diced tomatoes with juice 
• 1 can or bottle of dark beer (if using turkey, use light beer ... I only had an amber tonight so I used that with the beef) 
• 1 cup strong brewed coffee
• 2 (6oz) cans of tomato paste
• 1 (14.5oz) can of beef broth (I use low sodium) 
• 1/2c packed brown sugar
• 3.5T chili powder 
• 1T ground cumin or cumin seeds
• 1.5T unsweetened cocoa powder
• 2t ground cayenne (if you like spicy, 1t if you don't) 
• 1t ground coriander 
• 1t salt 
• 2 (15oz) cans of kidney beans (undrained) (I use a combo of light red and dark red beans) 
• 1 can of corn (drained) 
• optional 1 jalapeno (chopped, seeds removed -- only add this if you like spicy) 

Directions:

Heat oil in a large stock pot over medium heat. Cook the onions, garlic, and red pepper until soft. 

Add a little extra oil if needed before adding the ground beef and cubed sirloin. Brown the meat. 

When the meat is brown and the onions and red pepper soft, add the diced tomatoes with juice, beer, coffee, tomato paste, beef broth, brown sugar, chili powder, cumin, cocoa powder, cayenne, coriander, and salt. Stir in the 2 cans of beans and jalapeno if you're using it. Reduce heat to low and simmer for at least 1.5 hours. At hour 1.5, add the drained can of corn and simmer for another 30 mins. 

Now, you can eat this after simmering for 2 hours (3 hours of simmering is fine, too), but honestly, it's better the next day after refrigeration and the flavors get some time to mingle. I like to serve it in deep bowls with diced avocado, sharp cheddar (grated), chopped onion, and either sour cream or Greek yogurt. It also makes great chili-cheese burritos or nachos. 

My first non-fiction read in years ... and my first attempt at Mexican rice

For the past, oh, ten years or so, I've dedicated my sparse reading time to middle-grade and young adult novels. I had BIG PLANS this Christmas break. Finish ENDLESSLY and CINDER and read a partial and a full manuscript from two very dear friends.

But then I got distracted. By the first non-fiction I've read in years.

BLIND DESCENT is terrifying because it's true. Because the suffering and the deaths, the darkness ... real. Real. Real. Real. It doesn't scare me in the same way that a fictional ghost or zombie story may. Maybe because the scary parts of BLIND DESCENT ... the blow is softened by how human the story is. Humans are relatable - their drive and passion and suffering - even if you have no interest in exploring what appears to be Hell.

Anyway, there you have it. Oh, and here's a Mexican rice recipe! The first time I've ever made it and I'm quite pleased with how it turned out.

Mexican Rice

Ingredients:

• 2 cup medium to long-grain rice 
• 1 small-medium onion (I used half a red onion and half a sweet onion because I had some leftover, but I think sweet or yellow would work best) 
• 2-4 garlic cloves (minced) ( measurement depending on how much you love garlic)
• 2T olive oil 
• 1 heaping tablespoon of tomato paste
• chicken broth - how much will vary depending on your rice so read the cooking instructions and replace how much water is needed with chicken broth 
• pinch of oregano (Mexican oregano is the best if you can find it) 
• salt

Directions:

Heat the olive oil in a skillet until it shimmers slightly. Then, brown the rice, garlic, and onion until the rice is toasted (light brown) and the onions are soft (4-5 minutes).



Throw everything into a rice cooker if you have it (or not, cook the rice per the package's instructions). Add the chicken broth, tomato paste, and oregano. Add a couple pinches of salt. When the rice is done, you can always add more later to taste.




I use "Better than Bouillon" chicken base so I can control the quantity of stock I make 


This is what it looks like all combined ... 


This is my rice cooker. It's Japanese -- easy to use and awesome. I highly recommend it. It "sings" to you when the rice is done. Japan invents the *best* things!

Fluff the rice when it's done and serve with diced avocado (a must in my house). You can also make it "supreme" and add a dollap (I love this word!) of light sour cream (or Greek yogurt, it basically tastes the same) and some cilantro.

It's not Christmas unless there are cookies

It was 2 days before Christmas and we didn't have cookies in the house. Of course this would not do. So the hubby and I warmed up the oven - which gloriously warmed the house - and made Molasses Spice Cookies.

Ingredients: 

• 2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour 
• 2t of baking soda
• 1/2t salt
• 1t ground ginger
• 1.5t ground cinnamon
• 1/4t ground allspice
• 3/4t ground cloves
• 3/4 cups unsalted butter, softened
• 1/2c dark brown sugar, packed 
• 1/2c granulated sugar + 1/3c for rolling cookies
• 1 large egg
• 1t vanilla extract
• 1/3 cup unsulphered molasses

Directions here: http://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/molasses_spice_cookies/

Hubby and I really, really liked these. I think I preferred it with the optional glaze, but only lightly glazed. 

Ketchup noodle

Yup. A dish that is made of ketchup and noodles. This has what-Mom-used-to-make and childhood comfort food ALL over it. My mom usually made it with leftover holiday ham (the honey-glazed kind), but you can also buy deli ham for it. Just ask the deli to slice it half an inch thick.

Ingredients: 

• half a box of cooked pasta
• my favorite brand is Barilla -- I think it stays al dente the best
• I like to use shells or macaroni-shaped 
• a whole sweet onion - sliced 
• about 1/3 cup of ketchup (if it's too dry, add more) 
• 1.5 - 2 cups of diced ham (depending on how meaty you want it)
• optional: a pinch of sugar (to balance the ketchup if you want)

Directions:

Boil a pot of water. Add a couple dashes of salt. When the water is bubbling, add the pasta. Cook until just al dente (about 7 minutes). You don't want to cook the pasta all the way through at this stage.

Slice a whole sweet onion. A lot of onion is the key here. Add some olive oil/ butter or combo of both into a pan. Saute the onion until they're brown (medium heat)

When the pasta is done, add the noodles to the pot with the onions. Add the ham and ketchup and combine.

Serve in deep bowls and a glass of ice cold milk.

"We got engaged 2 years ago" dinner

He put a ring on it at Disneyland

To celebrate, I surprised him with a semi-fancy dinner. Remember those beautiful heirloom tomatoes we got at the Farmer's Market?

Well, I got some mozzarella and some fresh homegrown basil and made this:

I followed The Pioneer Woman's reduce-the-balsamic-method (basically, carefully reduce the balsamic until it's a syrup) and drizzled that, and some olive oil, salt, and pepper, over it all. It was refreshing and divine. 

Served it with stuffed bell peppers + gravy (marinara sauce). 

I started with Giada De Laurentiis and Emeril's recipes, but then customized it by: 

* using ground turkey 

* using spicy Italian pork sausage 

* excluding the egg, rice, and bread crumbs 

* using jarred marinara sauce (added extra seasoning, a little bit of sugar, and wine) 

* pre-cooking the meat before stuffing 

* par-boiling the peppers 

* using extra seasoning (i.e. Italian seasoning, Mexican oregano, garlic) 

* adding chopped mushrooms and onions, fresh basil 

* covering the tops with pecorino romano and mozzarella (last 7 minutes or so) 

Turned out pretty tasty. We seemed to eat peppers for days! Next time, I want to try them "meatloaf" style: topped with ketchup, with the meat baked in the oven. 

It was a really colorful dinner

P.S. Being married rules. 

I less than three Farmer's Markets

I used to sleep till noon. That was probably because staying up till 4am was normal for me. But then I got a puppy and since we're still crate training, we have to wake up a lot earlier to let him out.

One pro that came out of all this early morning business? Farmer's Markets!

A couple of weekends ago, I was on the hunt for fresh beets. The fabulous @authoressanon tweeted about how delicious fresh beets were so I wanted to try it.

Other than staining everything it touches, beets are great and one of my favorite vegetables. Sugary sweet and so easy to cook, you can either:

(1) Per @authoressanon: peel, slice thinly, sauté them in real butter (which I hardly ever use ... we're an olive oil family) until done to your liking, and then sprinkle with salt and black pepper. Tip: to speed up the cooking, cover them, but watch them carefully so you don't overcook them! I served them with my go-to panko salmon recipe from one of my favorite cooking blogs: Simply Recipes.

(2) Another way to cook the beets came from my awesome chef friend from Google. Chef Russell is the Master of Meat. He makes the tastiest homemade bacon and is a magician with duck fat. To cook the beets, he told me to: trim the tops and bottom, but do not peel. Scrub until clean and place in foil pouches. 350 oven for about 1 hour 30 mins. I checked them at an hour. They're ready when you can easily pierce them with a knife. Using paper towels, carefully (because they're steaming hot!) rub the skin off. Cube and then serve with whatever sauce you have on hand (I had made honey mustard chicken so I just poured the extra chicken sauce over the beets - yum!). Or you can just toss with fresh herbs, salt, and pepper.

Here's today Farmer's Market bounty (courtesy of the Sunnyvale Farmer's Market):

Brown eggs, white eggs, speckled eggs, and one blue egg! 

I seriously can't stop buying heirloom tomatoes ... one of my all-time favorite ways to eat them is: poppy-seed bagel, cucumber+chive whipped cream cheese, and huge slices of tomatoes lightly sprinkled with pink salt. What's your favorite way to eat an heirloom tomato?

I'm going to whip up a Joe's scramble minus the scramble with the beautiful eggs tomorrow. Joe's scramble consists of ground beef, garlic, onions, mushrooms, cheddar cheese, your favorite spices/ herbs, and scrambled eggs - except I don't like scrambled eggs (unless Thomas Keller makes them because (A) I'd eat anything Thomas Keller makes and (B) his restaurant Ad Hoc makes them with crème fraîche). So I'm going to do it with sunny-side up eggs instead and probably add avocados, because I'm addicted to avocados. I got those at the Farmer's Market, too. 

blast to the past: Christmas

Today, I took my puppy to the beach for the first time:

Mitchell's Cove, Santa Cruz

It was a long, wonderful day that included a stop at my favorite fish market that makes the best cioppino in the universe:

Phil's Fish Market, Moss Landing

Now, he's asleep at my feet and I'm feeling lazy. So all I'm going to do is sit on this couch, with a glass of my favorite champagne (Domaine Carneros Vermeil Demi Sec) and catch this blog up. There has been a lot of epic eating since December 2011 and, well, not a lot of blogging.

Let's go back to Christmas!

Christmas morning, I woke up, baked a ham, and prepped the $103 prime rib (Whole Foods, highly recommend their meat). It was strange because it was the first time I didn't wake Christmas morning, ready to rouse my parents from sleep (they don't live with me anymore) and bound into the living room to see what Santa had brought. Instead, I was all woman-of-the-manor and stuff with a house full of in-laws to entertain.

Really, though. The whole day, I felt more like a general preparing for battle: cooking my first Christmas dinner ever. The hardest part? Trying to get everything out on the table at the same time AND piping hot.

Christmas Dinner menu (recipes linked when available):

* honey-baked ham (Costco!)

* garlic + rosemary rubbed bone-in prime rib with red wine + rosemary au jus (you can use thyme or rosemary)

Disclaimer: not the actual Christmas prime rib, but the same recipe

* mashed potatoes (pretty much just add a lot of butter and milk or cream and you can't screw this up ... though I may invest in a food mill ...)

* asparagus + bacon tossed in a champagne vinaigrette and topped with poached eggs (recipe: blanch the asparagus and cut into bite-size pieces, fry or microwave the bacon and crumble over the asparagus, 4 poached eggs [using this spiffy contraption], and dressed with champagne vinaigrette [I like Girard's champagne vinaigrette])

* salad with grilled pears and a homemade brown sugar balsamic dressing (recipe for dressing: 1 cup vegetable oil, 3/4 cup brown sugar, 1/2 cup balsamic vinegar, 4 minced garlic cloves, 1/2 teaspoon salt, 1/2 teaspoon paprika, 1/4 teaspoon ground pepper, stir well with a whisk)

* creamed corn (cheated - this one came from a can)

* dinner rolls (cheated - store bought)

Dessert:

* homemade vanilla bean creme brulee (I will talk about this recipe in another post - it's a doozy)
* homemade pecan pie
* homemade pumpkin pie
* homemade chocolate crinkle cookies
* and so much peppermint bark that I had tins of it left on Valentine's Day ...

***tip of the day*** eat leftover prime rib with spaghetti (half red sauce, half alfredo - the jar stuff is fine) ... it's ... ah ... my mouth just filled with drool.

Only 4 more months till Christmas!!!

Baked Beans and the Secret Ingredient

• 1 28oz can of Bush's baked beans (I had the Maple flavored one tonight) 
• extra bacon (as much as you want, pre-cooked in the microwave)
• half of an orange bell pepper <-- secret ingredient! 
• sauté bell pepper with red onion and 1T of garlic until soft 
• 1T of ketchup
• 1T of dijon mustard 
• sprinkled with brown sugar on top
• bake at 350 degrees for 20 minutes

A winner: chicken [parmesan] for dinner

I fried chicken for the first time ever. I did not start an oil fire. Hubby had 2.5 helpings. We have enough leftovers so I don't have to cook tonight.

Winner Winner, Chicken Dinner!

Chicken Parmesan
* the original recipe teaches you how to make a tomato sauce from scratch, but I decided to take the easy route and use jarred sauce (I like Ragu's Roasted Garlic sauce. I always add onions, more garlic, and wine. Lately, I've also added a bit more oregano and Italian seasoning to spice it up!)

INGREDIENTS
4 chicken breast cutlets (1 1/4 to 1 1/2 pounds total)
Salt
2 eggs
1 cup breadcrumbs
1 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese
1/4 cup olive oil
2 Tbsp fresh basil leaves, thinly sliced
8 ounces mozzarella cheese, sliced

INSTRUCTIONS
Preheat oven to 400°F. Working one at a time, place a chicken cutlet between two layers of wax paper (or plastic wrap). With a meat pounder, pound the chicken pieces to flatten them to an even thickness - between 1/4 - 1/2 inch. (If you don't have a meat pounder, you can use a rubber mallet, an empty wine bottle, or a heavy rolling pin.) Salt the chicken pieces well.

In a shallow bowl (large enough to dredge the cutlets), mix together the breadcrumbs, 1/2 cup of the Parmesan, and pinch of salt. In separate shallow bowl, whisk together the eggs.

Heat 1/4 cup of olive oil in a large sauté pan on medium-high heat. The oil should be shimmering, not smoking. Dredge the chicken pieces 1 piece at a time first in the egg mixture, then in the breadcrumbs. Then lay the pieces in the hot sauté pan. Turn the heat to medium, then gently fry the cutlets until they are golden brown, about 3-4 minutes per side.

Spread enough tomato sauce to thickly coat the bottom of 9x13 casserole pan or baking dish. Once the cutlets are browned on both sides, arrange them on top of the tomato sauce in the baking dish. Place sauce over each of the cutlets. Sprinkle the tops with sliced basil. Then top the cutlets with slices of mozzarella and the remaining 1/2 cup of Parmesan cheese.

Bake in the oven for 10-12 minutes, or until the mozzarella begins to brown.

Serves 4.

Prime Rib for dinner and breakfast!

One of the fun things about getting married is how, now, there are items all around the house that remind me of a person because that person bought me that item for our wedding. I have lovely turquoise Victorian tumblers from Authoress, a coffee table made of mango wood from my aunts and uncles in Vietnam, and a shiny All Clad roaster from our good friend, Mike. To break in said roaster - and to have a last little hurrah before I had to go back to work - I decided to make prime rib.

Prime rib is so fancy that it sort of intimidates me every time I make it, but I have a recipe that's pretty much fool proof.

Garlic Prime Rib from allrecipes.com

I basically follow the recipe except for a few changes:

• My roast is 5lbs instead of 10
• I use fresh thyme instead of dried (I learned that dried herbs have a more concentrated flavor so if a recipe calls for 1 tablespoon of a dried herb, you'll need 3x as much if you're going fresh)
• I always add extra garlic (I like to cut up thin slices of garlic, make slits in the meat, and slide the garlic chips in)
• And, per the reviews, I use the following cooking times: 460 for 12 minutes, 400 for 8 minutes, and then 325 for 20 minutes / pound (I take out the roast when my meat thermometer reads 130 so that after resting, the inside is a nice medium rare)
• For the au jus (which is SUPER key - seriously, this stuff is mouthwatering), I use Bobby Flay's thyme au jus recipe here (to make less than the quantity specified, I only use a cup and a half of red wine and a can of low sodium beef broth)

Voila! Fool proof:

The outside may look burned, but it's not. It's a very tasty crust. You'll probably be peeling off the pieces to snack on even before it hits the table. For sides, I decided to try two new recipes: Grilled Romaine and Creamed Corn.

I know, grilling lettuce may sound weird, but with fresh pecorino romano, it was very yummy (thanks to my cousin for the recipe). Warm, slightly wilted, slightly crunchy - I am going to make it again this week.

The creamed corn was also a hit with my new husband. The changes I made were: I used one can of corn (drained) instead of frozen, I used one cup of 2% milk total (no heavy cream), I added one sugar cube because that's what I had lying around, and I started with 1 tablespoon of flour, but added a little more because I wanted it thicker. Next time, I'll just add less milk.

Best part about making prime rib? Leftovers for breakfast! Or, breakfast for dinner. Steak and poached eggs, anyone? I made the mashed potatoes by first boiling the potatoes in the microwave - something else I haven't done before. Learn how here. Then, I just heated up some milk, butter, and garlic on the stove and poured the hot concoction over the potatoes I mashed with a fork. Served with fresh fruit!

I'm a wife!!

Hello, Internet! I'm back and a Mrs.! The wedding was the most fun I've ever had in my life and everyday, I wish we could do it all over again! But, after a lovely honeymoon in Hawaii and two never-ending weeks unpacking boxes and moving my new husband in, it's back to reality!

I am more than ready (though, admittedly, also more than rusty) to jump back into writing, but I'm waiting for one of the stories swirling in my head to become clearer and take hold. I may go back to a piece I was working on while I was planning the wedding, but I'm also intrigued by this new idea that seemed to appear out of nowhere. How many stories do you have in your head before you pick one? And after you pick one, how many are still in your head, vying for your attention?

There are two things I'm not quite ready for: (1) Going back to work after 5 glorious weeks off and (2) cooking everyday. Don't they both sound scary?! Yup, I have more appreciation for my mom (and all moms out there) who put something different on the dinner table every single night. How the heck? I'm so intimidated, I've been scouring the Internet for recipes. I don't outline my novels, but I've been trying to plan out my week. Watch out world! New working woman / wife, so excuse me while I collect recipes to try this whole making dinner everyday thing.

Chicken Parmesan
* the original recipe teaches you how to make a tomato sauce from scratch, but I decided to take the easy route and use jarred sauce

INGREDIENTS
4 chicken breast cutlets (1 1/4 to 1 1/2 pounds total)
Salt
2 eggs
1 cup breadcrumbs
1 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese
1/4 cup olive oil
2 Tbsp fresh basil leaves, thinly sliced
8 ounces mozzarella cheese, sliced

INSTRUCTIONS
Preheat oven to 400°F. Working one at a time, place a chicken cutlet between two layers of wax paper (or plastic wrap). With a meat pounder, pound the chicken pieces to flatten them to an even thickness - between 1/4 - 1/2 inch. (If you don't have a meat pounder, you can use a rubber mallet, an empty wine bottle, or a heavy rolling pin.) Salt the chicken pieces well.

In a shallow bowl (large enough to dredge the cutlets), mix together the breadcrumbs, 1/2 cup of the Parmesan, and pinch of salt. In separate shallow bowl, whisk together the eggs.

Heat 1/4 cup of olive oil in a large sauté pan on medium-high heat. The oil should be shimmering, not smoking. Dredge the chicken pieces 1 piece at a time first in the egg mixture, then in the breadcrumbs. Then lay the pieces in the hot sauté pan. Turn the heat to medium, then gently fry the cutlets until they are golden brown, about 3-4 minutes per side.

Spread enough tomato sauce to thickly coat the bottom of 9x13 casserole pan or baking dish. Once the cutlets are browned on both sides, arrange them on top of the tomato sauce in the baking dish. Place sauce over each of the cutlets. Sprinkle the tops with sliced basil. Then top the cutlets with slices of mozzarella and the remaining 1/2 cup of Parmesan cheese.

Bake in the oven for 10-12 minutes, or until the mozzarella begins to brown.

Serves 4.

For a side dish for above chicken, how about some grilled lettuce! Got this idea from my cousin's food blog:

INGREDIENTS

1 head of Romaine lettuce

enough olive oil to slather both sides

1/2 cup of fresh grated Romano (Parmesan or Asiago could also be used, just nothing from a green can)

pinch of salt

couple turns of black pepperdusting of granulated garlic

INSTRUCTIONS

Basically, grill the lettuce until it's slightly charred and then sprinkle with the cheese before serving.

Panko-Crusted Salmon

INGREDIENTS
4 teaspoons olive oil
4 pieces thickly cut, boneless salmon (each 6 oz)
Salt and pepper to taste
2 Tbsp honey mustard or sweet-hot mustard
2 teaspoons chopped fresh thyme
2/3 cup panko bread crumbs
2 Tbsp chopped Italian parsley
1/2 teaspoon Hungarian sweet paprika

INSTRUCTIONS
Preheat the oven to 400°F. Set the salmon on a foil-lined baking sheet skin side down. Sprinkle with salt and pepper.

In a small bowl, combine the honey mustard and 1 teaspoon of the thyme. In another small bowl, mix the panko with the remaining 1 teaspoon of thyme, 4 teaspoons of olive oil, parsley, and paprika. Add salt and pepper (a light sprinkle).

Using a small spoon, spread the mustard mixture on the salmon; top with the bread crumb mixture.

Roast the salmon for 12-14 minutes (test at 10) or until it is almost completely firm to the touch and flakes when poked with a fork. Serve at once.

Other recipes I want to try sometime:

Seared Tuna with Avocado

Dijon Grilled Pork chops

Farfalle with peas & pancetta

Hamburger Stroganoff (might try it with turkey and yogurt to be a little healthier)

Caramelized Baked Chicken

Caramelized Chicken with Sticky Rice

Midnight Surprise Beer-Butt Chicken Attack!

Yes. It's midnight and I have nothing better to do than to share some beer-butt chicken with you.

Warning: if you're a vegetarian, you may want to look away. Contains nude pictures of chickens.

The first time I made beer-butt chicken, we were in the middle of nowhere Colorado, in a rented cabin with no running water. If you try to make beer-butt chicken with no running water, it's difficult because of the whole salmonella thing. BUT if you make beer-butt chicken in a kitchen that has running water, you will have no problems at all. It's easy! and fun! and tasty!

P.S. If you are allergic to beer (gosh forbid) or do not like beer, you can also make this with cola.

Stuff you will need*:

1 whole chicken (about 4 lbs)
1 teaspoon of oregano
1 teaspoon of garlic powder
1 teaspoon of paprika
1 teaspoon of dried sage or rosemary or thyme (whatever you have on hand)
1 teaspoon of sea salt
1 teaspoon of ground black pepper
a lemon
a few cloves of garlic - peeled and cut into slices
a small piece of ginger

a can of beer or cola

* Really, all you need is the chicken and a can of beer or cola. You can use whatever spices you have a hankering for. I've made this recipe about a dozen times now and it's always different. When my rosemary is thriving, I use rosemary. Lately, I've been on a brown sugar + cayenne kick. What I do is rub the bird with olive oil and lots and lots of garlic (powdered or fresh minced). Then I do about a 1/2c of brown sugar and 1T or 2 of cayenne (cayenne is spicy, so beware). You know what is also fun to do? Brush the bird with honey near the end.

Directions: 

Remove the chicken from its package and give him a rinse under cold water. Don't forget to clean inside his cavities. Pat him dry with paper towels (and no, I don't know why I'm calling my chicken a him).

Mix the oregano, garlic powder, paprika, sea salt, ground black pepper, and dried sage, rosemary, or thyme together.

Cut the lemon in half and lightly rub it on the chicken - make sure to get under the skin, too (use your knife to help loosen the skin from the meat). Then, rub your mix of spices on the outside of the chicken, the inside of the chicken, and under the skin. Add more fresh ground pepper if you like that sort of thing.

Using a knife, carefully poke a couple slits in the chicken's breast, thighs, and drumsticks. Insert the slices of garlic into the slits. Wash your hands.

Open up the can of beer or cola and drink 1/4 of it. Cut a couple slices of ginger and garlic and put it in the can. Carefully stick the can up the chicken's butt. He should sit up on it easily, like this:























If you're having trouble balancing him, use his legs! While you're doing all this, get your beau, best friend, mom, grandpa, etc. to help you heat up the grill. When the grill is ready, carefully place him over medium-high, indirect heat (i.e. no coals or burners on directly under the bird). Cook the chicken with the grill cover on, for about an hour to an hour and a half. Check him at the hour mark. The internal temperature should be 165 degrees F in the thigh (juice should run clear when stabbed with a sharp knife). Really, really carefully remove him from the grill. Let him rest for 10 minutes before carving. Don't forget to remove the can before cutting - and be careful! The can will be super hot.

I've also done this in the OVEN! But you'll need a meat thermometer. 350 degrees until the temperature reads 165 degrees F in the thickest part of the thigh (about 1 hr to 1 hr 30 mins). Make sure to put the chicken in a roasting pan to catch the juices (tip: pour a can of baked beans around the beer or soda can [i.e. under the chicken, in the roasting pan]. chicken juices will drip down as everything cooks. makes a tasty (albeit greasy) side dish)
























Okay. Good night.